But that was me fourteen years ago...

My past success as a stage manager is well known in a small circle of folks in community theatre in Scarborough, a suburb of Toronto.  And it is from this crowd that I still, from time to time, get offers of community level work. Two folks have asked me if I would consider stage managing for them this month. Crazy. I haven't stage managed a show in fourteen years. So odd.  I know I project an air of competency and that's probably why folks from time to time ask me to stage manage. But, really, that was me fourteen years ago.

I don't mind the question though. Other than the fact that it's flattering, it always makes me look backward for a moment. The very nature of what I do requires me to focus on the now and the future. As a director -- well, as a person -- I seem to need to keep going. Keep adding skills, moving on to the next project.  But when someone reminds me that I was once this feisty little stage manager, I pause for a bit and look back.

I've come a long way, baby -- and really glad for it. Every show I direct takes me farther down this path, makes me think a little bit differently, challenges me to learn more, try harder. I like it. Love it, in fact, and have an awful lot of fun on the way. One of the reasons why I stopped stage managing?  I wasn't having any fun.  That little fact is key for me.  We should spend our time doing those things which make us happy. It took me a long time to learn that.

About thirty years, I guess.  Somewhere in my twenty-ninth year, I decided to discard 'aught tos' and start doing what I wanted.  Decided to put myself first.  This new attitude sent me along the road that led to directing, writing, mothering.  That decision twenty years ago has made me what I am today.  It's fun to stop, look back, and see your own trajectory, how far you've come.  It can give you an idea of where you might go.

So, would I ever go back to stage managing?  I don't think so.  But thanks for asking.